Outcome Focus E-Zine Report

The Award-Winning Monthly Resource for Professionals

Vol. 21  - June 12, 2001

Publisher: Anne Warfield
(mailto:info@impressionmanagement.com)
888-imp-9421 or 952-921-9421

(AOL users just copy the email address--not the
'mail to' into the 'to' line of your email program.)
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By subscription only!
Welcome!  To use this as a training tool:  Present
the situation to the group and have them brainstorm
how they would best handle the situation. Then share
the Outcome Focus answer and see how it relates or
differs from solutions the group found.

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IN THIS ISSUE
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1) What's in the News
2) Outcome Focus Situation/Solution
3) Anne's Aha
4) Coming up in the next issue
5) Product
6) About Anne Warfield and IMP

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1. What's In The News
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What Anne is being featured in

Out in June issues:
SAM Magazine - Exceeding sales goals

Coming up in July/August issues:
Employment Review - Delegating work more effectively
Electronic Business - How to deal with troublemakers
SAM Magazine - Keeping creative people motivated

Wherever possible, we will try to provide you with
direct links to these articles as well!

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2. Here's This Months Outcome Focus Situation/Solution
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How to be assertive without being aggressive

SITUATION: Dear Anne, I have been accused of being
too aggressive at work.  I am really confused by what 
people mean by this.  I think I am being assertive.  
I have a tendency to speak my mind at meetings and I 
don't necessarily sugarcoat things when I disagree.  
Shouldn't others just speak up if they disagree or do 
I have to alter myself in order to "fit in"?

OUTCOME DESIRED:  You want to get along with people at 
work.  You want to be viewed as a positive and strong 
person, not someone that sits on the fence and is wishy 
washy.  

HOW TO HANDLE: This can be a frustrating position to 
find yourself in.  Many people have a hard time 
distinguishing between aggressive and assertive.  Let's 
start there.  Assertive is putting forward positively 
and with confidence your thoughts and ideas, even in the 
face of adversity.  Aggressive is putting forward your 
thoughts and ideas in a combative readiness state. The 
difference between the two is that being assertive allows 
others to see where you clearly stand BUT also allows them 
to feel justified in having an opinion or thought that 
differs. While being aggressive comes off as it is "your 
way or the highway" and can often make others feel wrong" 
to have an opinion that differs from yours.

So how can you tell the difference?  If you are being 
aggressive, people will remain silent after you talk or 
they will move right to arguing with you.  If you are a 
manager, you will shortly find yourself surrounded by 
"yes" people.  If you are assertive, people will be 
thoughtful, ask questions and challenge you but you will 
rarely see them square their shoulders, lift their chin 
and stare defiantly at you.

Also, if you fall in to the "aggressive category" you most 
likely are a Producer.  Producers desire to have control 
over their area and at times inflict themselves on others 
inappropriately.  If you want to check out your personality 
style take our quiz at http://www.impressionmanagement.com/quiz.phtml 
It will show you your exact personality style and you can see 
how others perceive you.

BEST ACTION: Take a quick assessment.  At meetings, are you 
the first to speak up? Do you often interrupt others? Do you 
make body signs that show you disagree with another person? 
(These body signs would include grunting, tapping a pen, 
shuffling papers while the other person is talking, rolling your eyes, 
crossing your arms, looking away, glaring or crossing your arms)

If you do, try: 
listening with your head titled to one side as this 
will increase your listening and make the other person feel 
accepted and not judged.

asking for others opinions BEFORE offering your own

offering your thoughts and ideas prefaced by "what if we..." 
or "could we look at if from.." "I was thinking..." This will allow 
others to take in what you are saying without feeling shut off.

if you disagree with someone, "Tell me this.." "how does 
that fit with..." "can you share with me how.." "I understood that 
we were trying to do... and if that is true then, how does....."

************** Want To Perfect Your Skills? *************

Email back to us (mailto:info@impressionmanagement.com)
"Send me now" along with your phone number and we will
mail you your autographed copy of our "Outcome Thinking:
Getting Results Without the Boxing Gloves" book for
only $24! and that includes tax and shipping (over
$6 in savings).

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3. Anne's "Aha"
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"The more sand that has escaped from the hourglass of our 
life, the clearer we should see through it." Jean Paul

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4. NEXT TIME: Another Situation Submitted By You!
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5. I Want More Products So I Can Perfect My Skills
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To order product, simply return this email with
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information.

Products: Outcome Thinking Book $24.95
Communicating More Effectively Book $14.95
(Body Language)
Body Language Video $99.95
Success Negotiating Audio Tape $14.95
GOALS Set $39.95


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6. About Anne And IMP
======================================================

Anne Warfield, CSP*
President
Impression Management Professionals
7200 France Avenue South, Suite 224
Minneapolis, MN 55435
952-921-9421
888-imp-9421
952-921-9420 Fax
Email: mailto:info@impressionmanagement.com
Check us out at: http://www.impressionmanagement.com  

"A true leader is not one you look up to because
they are the best. A true leader is one that draws
the best out in you." Anne Warfield

*CSP- Certified Speaking Professional; a designation
held by only 7% of all speakers nationwide

Member of the National Speakers Association